Hit 1000 days on my gym streak and nobody knows I cried in the parking lot

I hit 1000 consecutive days at the gym on Tuesday. Sounds crazy, right? Nobody at work knows. My wife thinks I just like working out. The truth is I started this streak right after my dad passed away from a heart attack at 58. Every day I walk in, I'm not just lifting weights. I'm trying to outrun his genes. The receptionist handed me a little paper certificate and I almost lost it right there. But I smiled, said thanks, and went to the locker room to wipe my eyes. Has anyone else attached some deep personal stuff to a random number like that without telling people?

3 comments

3 Comments

parker_palmer4423d agoMost Upvoted

oh man @fiona_west21 i get the 13 thing but i think the grief rituals part is a little off here. i mean, for me it's not really about control or rituals. it's more like this quiet conversation i'm having with my dad every morning. like i walk in and i'm just saying "hey old man, i'm still here kicking". the 1000 days thing feels less like a coping mechanism and more like a promise i made to someone who can't answer back. idk maybe it's just me but the parking lot cry felt more like relief than sadness. like finally exhaling after holding your breath for three years.

iris92724d ago

I read something once about how grief can turn into these weird rituals and numbers, and this hit me right in the feels. It's like your brain grabs onto something you can control when everything else feels out of your hands. That 1000 days isn't random at all, it's your way of saying "not today" to what happened to your dad.

fiona_west2123d ago

Oh man, that totally nails it! I once got so into tracking how many times I saw the number 13 after my dog passed that I became basically a professional 13-spotter. It's hilarious and sad at the same time, like my brain decided "okay, we can't fix this huge thing, but we can definitely count things and feel just a tiny bit of control." So yeah, I totally get the 1000 days thing being your brain's weird little rebellion against the chaos. It's like our minds throw these quirky little lifelines when everything else feels like it's sinking.