Appreciation post: why I stopped pretending to be fine at family dinners

I used to show up to every Sunday dinner at my mom's house with a big smile, talking about how great my job was going. But last Thanksgiving, my cousin asked me why I look tired all the time, and I just snapped and told her about getting passed over for a promotion at work. Ever since then, I sit in the corner chair by the window and let myself be quiet when I feel bad. It took 38 years to learn that being real with family beats being fake happy any day. Has anyone else stopped forcing that happy face at holiday meals and actually felt better?

3 comments

3 Comments

stone.lisa5d ago

Oh man, good for you. It's funny how we get trained to put on that mask everywhere, not just at dinners. Like at the grocery store checkout, you smile and say you're fine when the cashier asks, even if you're having a rough day. I think most people are just going through the motions with each other and nobody wants to be the one to break the spell. But once you crack it open even a little, you realize the people who actually matter don't run away. They just sit there in the quiet with you. It makes you wonder how many other places in life we're wasting energy pretending.

mia7004d ago

Nah, @stone.lisa, I actually think most people just don't give a crap either way.

quinna894d agoTop Commenter

“Going through the motions with each other” is bang on. @mia700, maybe it's less about giving a crap and more that everyone's scared to be the one whose mask slips first in the checkout line.