Just realized I was apologizing for asking questions at work for over a decade

My coworker pulled me aside after a meeting last Thursday and said my constant 'sorry but can I ask...' made me look unsure, and she was right. Now I just say 'can you clarify that part?' and people actually listen better. Has anyone else had to retrain how they talk after a single comment?

3 comments

3 Comments

violar351mo agoMost Upvoted

Yeah dropping the sorry completely changed how seriously people took me.

joel_clark371mo ago

Hear you on that. I noticed the same thing in my own life a few years back. I used to apologize before asking a question at the hardware store, like "sorry, but do you know where the PVC fittings are?" and the guy would barely look up. Once I just said "excuse me, where are the PVC fittings?" he'd walk me right to the aisle and ask if I needed anything else. It's a small change but it really shifts how people see you, like you actually deserve their time instead of being an inconvenience.

parkerbrown1mo ago

Hold on, is it really that simple though? I mean @violar35, I get what you're both saying, and yeah, dropping the 'sorry' might make you sound more confident on the surface. But what if that little 'sorry' is actually just basic politeness in certain workplaces, and getting rid of it makes you come off as too blunt or demanding?