My total 180 on that friend who ghosted our group chat

For months, I was so mad you just dropped off the map without a word. I told everyone you were being selfish. Then I found out from your sister you were dealing with some really heavy family stuff and just shut down. I've had this apology written in my notes for weeks about how wrong I was to assume the worst. But sending it now feels like it would just be for me, to clear my own guilt, not to actually help you.

4 comments

4 Comments

christopher_patel1mo ago

Janah83's right that silence often has a story. We're quick to make it about us when someone goes quiet, but usually it's their own battle we can't see. Learning that changes how you handle people pulling away.

the_claire12d ago

Ever read that line about how everyone is fighting a battle you know nothing about?

janah831mo ago

Back in college, a roommate stopped talking to everyone for a whole semester. We all thought she was just being rude or stuck up. Turns out she was caring for her sick mom and working two jobs to help out. It taught me that silence often has a story you don't know. Now I try to give people the benefit of the doubt when they go quiet.

thomas_lopez1mo ago

You said silence often has a story. I agree, but sometimes people are just busy or stressed with their own stuff. Like, my coworker got quiet when he had a big project, not because of a personal crisis. We should still be kind, but it's okay to ask if everything's fine. That way, we don't assume things without knowing.